


Saudade

by Mikeara_san



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: M/M, mentions of Agent Washington and Leonard Church
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-25
Updated: 2014-06-25
Packaged: 2018-02-06 05:24:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1845928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mikeara_san/pseuds/Mikeara_san
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They were missing people. They all were. Just some, more than others...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Saudade:  
> a Portuguese word that has no direct translation in English. It describes a deep emotional state of nostalgic or profound melancholic longing for an absent something or someone that one loves. Moreover, it often carries a repressed knowledge that the object of longing may never return.

Wash wasn't just someone Tucker missed. Wash was Tucker's goal, his mission. He would do whatever it took to get Wash back. Wash was the reason he got up in the morning. Wash was the reason he trained.  
Every day was leg day. No breaks until noon, and you didn't stop until you could barely walk. If anyone complained, Tucker would say,  
"Wash would have worked you twice as hard. Bow Chicka Bow Wow. Now get to running."  
All the recruits had heard the stories by now: The Great Agent Washington of Project Freelancer, once a member of an elite team of super soldiers, who allied with the Reds and Blues to stop The Meta, who betrayed them by teaming up with said The Meta in an effort to gain his freedom, and became friends and comrades with the Reds and Blues once they terminated the remnants of Project Freelancer. Yes, they'd heard the stories. Grif told of the Reds and Blues escapades with a dramatic flare, and Simmons or Caboose would join in to add a detail or three. And on rare occasions when Tucker wasn't training, he'd tell them about his adventures, and about Wash's.  
They were fascinated by the story of his sword, disgusted and intrigued on the birth of his alien son, Junior, and captivated by his tellings of his adventures with Agent Washington.  
Everyone saw the look in his eyes when he talked about Wash. It was as if he wasn't even looking at them anymore, but at someone else, at someone who wasn't even there. He was looking at Wash.  
A rumor spread around quickly, all about how the reason Tucker was so motivated, so DRIVEN, to get Wash back, was because he was in love with him. No one asked Tucker, no one dared to, for fear of extra laps; but he heard it, the quiet, excited whispers behind his back during the breaks or at dinner. He questioned it a little. He wasn't in love with Wash. He-They needed him. They couldn't turn these recruits into soldiers when they were barely even qualified to do so. But...still, there were times these thoughts kept Tucker up at night. Did he love Wash? Is that why he felt empty? Tucker was a ladies man, so why would he be into a dude? But then why does he miss Wash so much?  
The questions were only answered by more questions, and he was getting more and more confused. He kept hearing the whispers. They were building it up, more and more. Two star-crossed lovers, torn apart by war, trying desperately to find one another. Hell, now Tucker was starting to believe it.  
So okay, maybe he IS in love with Wash. What exactly could he do about it? It's not like Wash would feel the same. So, he'd just have to keep this to himself, like a certain orange-armored Hawaiian does for the cyborg-brainiac...yeah.  
All he had to do, was train, and become good enough, strong enough... to get Wash back. Then...Wash would know what to do.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They were missing people. They all were. Just some, more than others...

Caboose has been having a lot of off days lately. He's been missing a lot of people too. He missed Freckles, and Agent Washington, and Donut, even the angry Red Sergeant; but most of all, he missed Church.  
The trainees don't really hear much about who this Church guy was from Reds or Blues. They hear stories about him, but those don't go into detail. They just don't want to talk about him...except for Caboose.  
He'll tell them stories about his "Super,duper-best-friend in the whole wide universe" and how they met, and the time he accidentally killed him, and how Church turned out to be "a gay robot ghost" which was really an AI. He'll get really excited when he talks about Church, like a kid talking about their favourite toy, then he'll become really quiet...He really misses Church.  
On his off days, Caboose prefers to stay in bed as long as possible. Tucker lets him skip training on those days; he knows how much Caboose is hurting.  
Caboose tells himself that, maybe if he believes hard enough, he'll be back at Blue base, and everyone will be ok, and Church will be there, and its all just a crazy dream. But it's not a dream. Lieutenant Smith is the first to find him.  
Smith will knock on the door of his superiors quarters, and hear the tell-tale sounds of sobbing. He'll enter the room to find a tearful Caboose, sitting on the edge his bed, questioning,  
"Where are you Church?"  
Smith says nothing. He just tries his best to comfort his distressed captain.  
It becomes routine. Smith isn't Church's replacement. He and Caboose both knew that. But Smith was caring in nature, and Caboose needed to be cared for on those days.  
Caboose tells him stories, about Church, and how even though he was mean most of the time, he was a really nice guy. He'd tell Smith that no matter what, Church would be Caboose's best friend. He'd tell Smith, through choking sobs and runny noses,  
"I love him"  
Yeah...Caboose really missed Church."

**Author's Note:**

> yes I am lame  
> please enjoy this fan fic i made


End file.
